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Her Sense of Identity is Quite Solid

Her Sense of Identity is Quite Solid

Apo: Grandma, the shirt you gave me has bunnies on it. But the jeans ripped before I could wear it.

Grandma: Oh no, I am sorry about that.

Apo: Grandma, Isabel wrote her phone number on my arm. She’s my bffffff it means my best friend friend friend friend friend forever. We don’t want to lose touch even if she leaves camp tomorrow.

Grandma: That’s nice.

Apo: Grandma, there’s a mean boy in camp.

Grandma: How is it that you keep meeting these mean boys in camp?

I was quite surprised by her responses. Notice how she frames them as blessings.

Apo: Grandma, it is to keep me challenged in life, so I can have the skills on how to deal with them.

Grandma: Oh? I hope you don’t become like them, mean to others.

Apo: Oh no, Grandma, no worries, I was born to be a nice girl.

Wow, her self-identity and self-awareness are commendable. She is ahead of the game by how she looks at herself. I was so happy to hear this.

Today, while I napped, her grandpa fed her snacks and he proudly showed me what he fed her: rice, scrambled egg with cheese, seaweed, and mango nectar with nata de coco.

Grandma can keep napping, which she has been doing, 2 days of long naps and it is great!

Her Sense of Identity is Quite Solid

Happy Birthday To The Love Of My Life

Happy happy birthday to the love of my life Enrique de la Cruz You are the quintessential Renaissance man, who keeps pushing the envelope with your physical goals and achieving them. Thank you for being the best crazy playmate of our #princess2015la, steady camping outdoors, road trip partner to me, your daughter, your son; the best travel companion for me, the conscientious juicer of power greens and fruits, the best philosopher mentor to Cat, and a great challenge to me to keep developing and growing, just to keep up with you. Thank you for who you are and who you have become. Happy 79th and more thriving years to come. Thank you for showing up in life with vigilant robustness! I love you and I have loved you all these 45 years! Keep walking, keep bicycling, and what an appropriate birthday to celebrate at Bicyclette.

We had such gracious and attentive service at @bicyclette.la. Such great service was matched by great quality bouillabaisse, steak, fromage, salad, and the best-ever French onion soup, capped by pear almond tart. It was a great dining-out birthday celebration.

Her Sense of Identity is Quite Solid

Beyond Thankful

“The best, ang sarap,” texted by #chefjo inspired me to do my next batch, 12 bags, 10 bags already spoken for. I really wait for my optimum time to do this with inspiration.

By midafternoon, another order for 8 bags came in. I ran out of oats. Within an hour, my deliveries arrived.

Thank you hubby for chopping the dried #ManilaMangoes. I finished working on three batches in two hours. Cooling them now before bagging.

My #princess2015la helped in affixing labels on the bags and unloading the deliveries.

After bagging, two more orders came in. This means I need to make batch 8.

#thankyouhubby❤️

#thankyouprincess2015la

#micasadeamore

Her Sense of Identity is Quite Solid

Simple but Memorable

Joint birthday celebrations of my hubby’s and my son-in-law. It was simple, warm, and plenty of stories exchanged. A very small crowd of immediate family, a very good friend, and outdoors. Life is better with these two guys on earth and family around.

A big hit – my daughter is a fabulous pastry chef – she made a perfect tart, with us tasting the mango gelee, coconut cream with mango and mango in whipped cream, three layers of goodness in brown butter crust. She makes it with so much love and creativity this time of the year. Thank you so much @coriput and @sergnflo for hosting us outdoors.

Why? Pandemic has a transmission rate of 19, meaning one positive case can be transmitted to 19 folks, per CDC and LA County Dept of Health.

Her Sense of Identity is Quite Solid

Catherine “Cat” Macabagdal Oriel: Designing Life’s Excellence as GWU’s Summa Cum Laude Graduate and Upcoming Forbes’ Social Media Producer

“To live our ultimate purpose is to thrive in our soul’s calling, sculpting ourselves into our highest ideal so that we may give our best away.” – Carolyn Campagna Kleefeld.

I was reminded of Cat Oriel when I read Kleefeld’s quote, an author of twenty-five books, a line of fine art cards, an English-born American author, poet, and visual artist, for whom a contemporary art museum is named after, inside California State University of Long Beach.

Why, exactly? I reflected on my decades-long conversations, emails, and moments of encounter with Cat, and what I noticed is the beauty of her soul foregrounding our interactions.

Might it be her beautiful heart that underwrites this relationship, much like her poems, which earned her the coveted Poet Laureate title in Archer School for Girls, a result of being the best, out of 200 submissions?

Cat was raised in an ecosystem of superior love, where her siblings describe her lovingly, “Everybody loves Cat,” as her friends [Abby, Zachary, Sophie, Sarah, and Catherine] who shared Cat as a caring and an empathetic best friend.

Her success resonated beyond DC, where guests included relatives who travelled from Canada, New York, Las Vegas, Los Angeles, D.C., and Florida.

Abby’s grandmother, based in Florida, joined us at the luncheon.  She described how considerate and thoughtful Cat and Abby’s friends were when they stayed one spring break in Florida.  

Auntie Bebs described Cat’s superlative abilities including her GPA, which was quickly corrected as 3.95. It invited a query from a self-described constipated, wooden academician, Enrique, who asked: “Who was that professor that caused you to lower your GPA?” 

Cat nonchalantly smiled: “Statistics,” and rather than cast blame on the professor, she admitted she got a B, as she did not put forth the effort.

Cat’s parents are Cora and Roger, who are busy entrepreneurs, publishers of Asian Journal, a community newspaper and Balikbayan magazine, based in two continents, with exacting deadlines, as well as other thriving businesses. Imagine how frantically busy they are, yet, you sense their solid teamwork as a couple, in making their children a priority.

Roger described Cat’s graduation as “one of the best days of our lives.” He was elated that she found her own unique place and “we are so proud that you have exceeded our highest hopes and dreams.” He affirmed her excellent work habits, positive outlook, and passion and to me, he said how caring Cat is to her siblings, giving credence to his remark: “seeing what you have become, you have grown into a beautiful, strong woman before our eyes.” 

Roger could not contain his delight at what Cat has achieved, neither could her sisters, Carina (a Fordham University graduate who organized the first FinTech summit in her campus) and Christina (GWU graduate, a decade-long communications consultant and Chief of Revenue for Bayani Pay) and her mom, who quietly would introduced me to the clan, who had travelled from Canada, New York and Las Vegas to be with Cat.

You might be wondering how wisdom, good character, and excellence were fostered in this young Summa Cum Laude? 

I asked questions from her mom, Cora who gave me pragmatic and inspiring takeaways.

How did you raise Cat? Just more on your intentions as a mom.

I raised Cat to be self-reliant and a freethinker.

I wanted her to pursue interests that she is passionate about.

There are habits we teach our children during their formative years that you think they would not heed, for example -being organized. 

However, it gave me great joy to discover that living on her own while away in college that she made this habit, among others, part of her lifestyle. 

An established routine coupled with good habits, I believe, enabled her to succeed.

But what about when Cat has moments of weaknesses, how does she cope?

How did you support her when she was at her lowest points? 

Volleyball has always been an important part of her life since grade school until her senior year of high school.

I always use this volleyball lesson as an analogy whenever asked about overcoming difficulties. 

“Play it like you’re six feet tall”

That’s what I have always told her. 

She is not as tall as most volleyball players, but she learned how to develop other skill sets that compensated for the lack in height through physical and mental training. We win or lose in our heads.

Most teenagers go through a period of confusion, identity crisis and doubts. We guided her through the process, but we let her find the solution on her own. 

Through this process, she was able to learn the concept of self-efficacy. 

Self-efficacy is the belief in one’s capability to produce desired results through one’s behavior.

Being in sports taught her valuable lessons on discipline, teamwork, healthy competition, commitment, goal setting, mental toughness and handling fear & failure. 

Much like Shinichi Suzuki’s insight that “Sound breathes life – without form it lives,” Cat lives with no awareness of age barriers – she easily makes friends amongst different age groups. 

I scrolled through my email and realized as far back as 2017, while in high school, she was into projects that made a difference amongst high school and college students, like organizing a day of shadowing business leaders. 

When she was part of an organization, ‘Look What She Did’, she tells the story, using a video, of Dolores Huerta, a living legend who received the Presidential Medal of Freedom and inducted into the National Women’s Hall of Fame. Huerta was an advocate of the farmworkers who was with Cesar Chavez and Larry Itliong, who persuaded Chavez to go on strike for better working conditions in the grape fields, increasing each crate’s harvest pay by only twenty five cents, yet, it took a year of international boycott of grapes to achieve those demands. Huerta was the first to say, “Si Se Puede,” and Cat correlated that with Barack Obama’s campaign slogan, “Yes, We Can.”

Cat began her thank you graduation speech with a quote that when one aims for the moon, who knows one might just land amongst the stars. 

Joining her as GWU graduates, were her own siblings, stars in their own lives: Christina, the eldest is a GWU graduate in political communication who completed her bachelor’s in three years, and a brother-in-law, Dr. Neal Joseph, a summa cum laude graduate in medicine, who is married to Cat’s sister, Dr. Roxanne Oriel Joseph, a pediatrician. 

Openness to diversity of ideas and age groups

Cat has an uncharacterisitic depth of character for a person in her early twenties, an old soul as others would describe – open to ethnicities, and to receive the wisdom of mentors, with a sincere and humble attitude that she does not possess all knowledge. She is quite forthcoming with her own point of view, shares it candidly, but not with such a certainty as to leave no doubt for other viewpoints to emerge.

One weekend of visit to the East Coast, I casually connected to Cat and it was her weekend of preparing for a philosophy exam. I offered a coffee break with my travelling companion/philosopher/husband [Enrique] and said, “Cat, I have a spouse with exactly that expertise. Why not have coffee with us and talk about philosophy?” After, true to the training of my spouse as a teacher, he gave Cat a homework assignment, “Why don’t you write all your questions that you want some clarity on?”

The following day, Cat came prepared with ten questions, written on her laptop. After asking all, which lasted two hours, she wrapped it up with another overarching question: “How do you reconcile when a philosopher takes you to the extreme perspective that clashes with what you were exposed to and have learned thus far?” Imagine her perspective of being respectful to the traditional thinking that she had acquired while leaving herself room to be persuaded?

“You look at this philosopher’s perspective and determine how far he is in the spectrum of thoughts you have learned, is he still logical or simply intellectualizing and then, the key question to ask is how much does it contribute to the humanity you want to see,” Enrique responded.

Cat had that aha look and we all went for our dim sum lunch.  She asked more questions, making sure she fully understood both sides of the perspectives, more on the entire spectrum of thought, that this philosopher was describing. She aced that exam.

After, she shared with me the two-term papers wherein she explored the nuances of opposite perspectives and contributed her own humanistic, balanced point of view. Oh how I wanted to give her a hug, after reading those term papers! 

I inquired some more from Cora.

How did you keep her aligned with her own chosen goals, not pressuring her, but nurturing her?

I inculcated early on to all my children about keeping the Faith. To always keep hope alive in their hearts. 

We will not always be there to guide them. They will have to learn to figure out a lot of things on their own most of the time. 

Wise for her age, when Cat doesn’t get the results she desires, instead of being bitter or beaten, she moves on. She doesn’t view an unwanted outcome as failure or defeat, rather as a redirection. 

It is no wonder that she is at the summit of her academic journey, as she accepted all opportunities of being nurtured, of being mentored and maximized them to achieve her own sense of internal clarity. Maybe because she is most aware that she must be clear in what her questions are, in her own beliefs, from every angle, yet, staying curious and concerned with the societal barriers of inequality and unfairness.

A heartfelt repetition of your best calligraphy is superior performance, Master Shinichi Suzuki once inculcated in his music students, for he did not believe in mediocrity, nor did he believe that genius is inborn. Instead, it is about acquiring the best habits and repeating them each time, yielding to superlative results.

No doubt Cat will design more superior achievements in her full-time job as Social Media Producer of Forbes Magazine, once she is back from her backpacking trip with her college friends, her DC family, as she said.

Cat, you are truly a gift from the Sea, a lovely shell, and a lovely image, which keeps outgrowing her oyster bed, “looking forward to the freedom of the nautilus that had left its shell for the open seas.” Keep adventuring into the creative seas of your imagination, notwithstanding the fair weather, favorable winds, the ghastly cold weather, or even the peak of summer heat, much like your exemplary degree says it all: Bachelor’s Degree in Journalism and Mass Communication and two minors in Women, Gender and Sexuality Studies and Creativity, Innovation and Entrepreneurship. Cat also got the Hoberman Prize where only a distinct few qualify out of hundreds and Philip Graham Foundation Scholarship, named after the founder of Washington Post.

Congratulations and Bravo to the nth degree!!

__________

Footnote: Cat has called me Tita Prosy, though not a blood relative, since I met her when she was 12 years old. I included her story and poem as part of my book, ‘Even the Rainbow Has a Body’, recognizing her wisdom. I was challenged by folks wondering how a young teen poet was included, to which I said, “watch how she grows to her potentials.” 

Photo 1: A collage of an earlier photo of Christina graduating from GWU, a BA degree in Political Communications next to Cat; and Cat graduating from GWU with a BA degree in journalism and communications

Photo 2: Columbian College Medal that Cat Oriel obtained, graduating with two minors in Women, Gender and Sexuality Studies and Entrepreneurship, Creativity and Innovation

Photo 3: Cora Oriel, Cat Oriel and Roger Oriel

Photo 4: Dr. Neal Joseph, Cat Oriel, and Christina Oriel. Cat lovingly wore the stole that her weekend mentor in philosophy, Enrique ironed and carefully packed for her.

Photo 5: Carina, Cora, Christina, Cat and Roger Oriel

Photo 6: Cat surrounded by her friends, Abby and Chloe

Photo 7: Cat’s graduation photo

Photo 8: Prosy Delacruz, Cat Oriel and Enrique Delacruz, PhD in Philosophy 


Photo 9: Carina Oriel, Cat Oriel and Christina Oriel who coined the term :Everybody Loves Cat

Her Sense of Identity is Quite Solid

The Good Samaritan Effect

I joined a spiritual reflection meeting that includes songs, gospel reading, lay reflection and Fr. Aris, SVD, giving the reflection.

Let me share what I learned: “The Good Samaritan Effect, and where there’s actualized goodwill, one to the other, we create heaven on earth.”

What made it quite memorable in my heart is Fr. Aris shared a story of a fellow priest who visited. Usually, amongst priests, given their limited resources, they split the bill. But, Fr. Aris got a gift of generosity, a meal treat from his brother priest.

When he stopped at a convenience store, he paid for the supplies that he needed, then encountered two young children, about 9yo, who were still in the streets at 10pm. He asked them if they had dinner. “No,” they replied. So, he confidently told them to get whatever they wanted. But, the two did not abuse his generosity and just got one chicken leg with rice.

After receiving the gifts, one boy offered to give up his meal and asked instead for their other friends to be fed. The boy got pesos instead.

Inspired by the generosity of the brother priest, he treated all 7 boys and paid Php 700, equal to $13.00. Still left with more pesos than before, this memory is now seared in his heart and called it the “Good Samaritan Effect.”

I affirmed a similar example of the generosity of Spirit that I learned from my dad, Eleazar. He lost his guerilla parents who were assassinated by Japanese Imperial Soldiers, as a teenager. He went to class, walking barefooted, for miles and pants made from rice sacks. At times, he got fed by generous strangers.

Every Sunday, after mass, when we were with him, he would “pakyaw” buy all the sampaguita garlands from the street vending boys. I remembered him while I visited Vigan with my classmates.

I then saw a taho vendor. I asked him how much does it cost for his two full tubs of taho, a soybean curd drink served with sugar syrup and boba? He gave me a number, just like Fr. Aris, less than my budgeted allowance for the day. I gave it all to him and my classmates got treated to taho. I did not know then that I learned the Good Samaritan effect from my father. I learned that from Fr. Aris.

This is the concept that I had when I sold my book, using the Good Samaritan effect if friends offered to sell my book, Even the Rainbow has a Body, and even now in selling #iylagranola. Even if I give bags away, folks pay.